These are my random musings. Hopefully they will be witty, insightful, and frequently updated.
Chirac reserves nuclear response to terror
Published on January 20, 2006 By singrdave In War on Terror
Here's responsible statesmanship of the worst kind. Jacques Chirac, President of France and the guy with his finger on the button of France's nuclear arsenal, threatened to use nuclear weapons in response to any terrorist attack on France that originated from abroad. For example, after a 9/11-type attack on French soil, the retaliation would be a nuclear strike on Afghanistan.

Chirac showing his tough, manly side.

From today's Washington Post:

French President Jacques Chirac says a nuclear response is possible against any country that sponsors a terrorist attack against French interests.

Chirac said that his country's nuclear arsenal has been reconfigured to include the ability to make a tactical strike in retaliation for terrorism, the Washington Post reported Friday.

"The leaders of states who would use terrorist means against us, as well as those who would envision using ... weapons of mass destruction, must understand that they would lay themselves open to a firm and fitting response on our part," Chirac said during a visit to a nuclear submarine base in Brittany.

"This response could be a conventional one. It could also be of a different kind."

The French president said his country had reduced the number of nuclear warheads on some missiles deployed on France's four nuclear submarines in order to target specific points rather than risk wide-scale destruction.


So France has the cojones (what is the French word for testicles? Ah, testicules. Thank you Babelfish.) to drop nukes onto a state-sponsored terrorist foe. I guess their nukes are gathering dust now, thanks to the Cold War being over. Chirac kills two birds with one stone: he thinks up a novel way to use up France's nuclear aresenal and shows his pecker just before national elections.

Chirac showing his smooth, weapon-like balls.

According to an authoritative survey by the International Institute for Strategic Studies in London, France has 348 nuclear weapons, including 288 submarine-launched ballistic missiles, 50 air-launched cruise missiles and 10 bombs that could be dropped from airplanes.

An effective deterrent? Maybe. A classy move? Definitely. It shows his statesmanship, even if it is a hollow threat.

Comments
on Jan 20, 2006
Those are balls. Those pictures are of balls.
on Jan 20, 2006
Beat ya by the click of a submit!
on Jan 20, 2006
Yes, you did. I saw your article when I finally finished my search for pictures of testicles.
on Jan 20, 2006

Yes, you did. I saw your article when I finally finished my search for pictures of testicles.

Well, yours is prettier with the pictures!

on Jan 22, 2006
Good grief! I was doing just fine 'til I saw the nice smooth weaponlike balls, at which point I quickly dissolved into a 5 minute fit of hysteria. Thought my head was going to explode. ... probably a good thing I wasn't near a french interest at the time, else they might have retaliated in an escalatory manner should my head truly have gone off.
on Jan 23, 2006
I was doing just fine 'til I saw the nice smooth weaponlike balls, at which point I quickly dissolved into a 5 minute fit of hysteria. Thought my head was going to explode.

It's all about les testicules, Arq.
The French are proud to show off their military might, which translates nicely into a nice European pissing match.