These are my random musings. Hopefully they will be witty, insightful, and frequently updated.
Oh, to be inside the criminal mind
Published on July 10, 2006 By singrdave In Current Events
So Eddie Griffin of the Minnesota Timberwolves recently crashed his car into some folks and is getting sued over it. Nothing special there. Typical pro athlete mischief. But the plaintiffs in the lawsuit claim that Griffin crashed his Escalade into their car because he was masturbating to some pornographic DVDs in his car while driving.

... What else can he do with his talented hands?

From MSNBC.com:

MINNEAPOLIS - A convenience store videotape recorded after a March crash involving Eddie Griffin shows the Minnesota Timberwolves forward telling store employees that he was drunk and he didn't want to go to jail. Even more outlandish are reports that Griffin was watching pornography while masturbating when he crashed, the Minneapolis Star Tribune reported.

He originally told the media he had dropped his cell phone and was trying to retrieve it when he crashed.


Griffin's defense? "I wasn't jerkin' it! I was just drunk -- drunk outta my mind!" Then he tried to bribe his way out of the arrest!

Now keep in mind: driving drunk is a FELONY. Driving while watching Tera Patrick get a little somthin' special on the DVD player, while a smidge embarrassing, isn't a crime. If that's all he did, he could pay some dough to the plaintiffs and the cops and be on his way. Would prison have to be on the horizon?

Comments
on Jul 11, 2006
Given the Choice?  I would probably say the same thing if I was stupid enough to be doing either while driving.
on Jul 16, 2006
But beating off while driving? Amazing what people are capable of.